Anxiety Control

I am usually rather open about my anxiety and depression, so hopefully the title of this post isn't a surprise to you.  There are times that my anxiety runs high.  So high, that I can't do some things that I need to get done during a day.  I often have battles with myself to literally leave the house. 

On the days where I can't think clearly or can't really do much more than sit on the couch, I knit.  When I knit, it soothes my mind and decision making is easier.  Occasionally, I get hyper focused on a project, but that is OK. 

At one point, my go to soothing knitting project was a Hitchhiker Beyond Shawl.  I loved that  project.  The way the colors striped in a rainbow of colors.  The way the yarn felt as it went between my fingers and onto the needles.  Something about it calmed my anxiety and made the nagging thoughts and tears just stop.  It was a project that I started when I was going through a rough patch.  It filled in the gaps when therapy wasn't enough and it soothed my mind.  I carried it with me for quite a few months.  I picked it up when my soul needed soothing.  I even knit it while at a Knit In Public event in Saratoga on World Wide Knit In Public Day.

These are some photos I took of it in progress.

 The past few weeks have been a little stressful for me.  I could have worked on the 2 other Hitchhiker Beyond shawls that I have been working on, but I decided to make dishcloths since they are quick and rather portable.  I like quick projects sometimes because I feel like I accomplished something, even if it is one dishcloth a day.  These are the ones that I have finished over the past few weeks.

These are some that I finished while working on Christmas gifts toward the end of last year.  Sometimes working on multiple large projects can cause me anxiety because I feel like I need to get everything done now.  The smaller projects calmed down the get it done now voice.